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[personal profile] 100apologies
THIS IS BASICALLY A CANON DUMP/INTERPERTATION. Because playing Miranda in Camp has brought up a lot of issues that causal play over at [livejournal.com profile] dgmdressroom hasn’t, even though I play her and like five other Mirandas sob over there, too, and the premises for both are fairly similar.

So the first and most obvious issue with Camp and Miranda is confidence. The best scene to illustrate her weird relationship with confidence is the scene where she first rejoins the group, shortly after Allen’s purported death in China. Without any hesitation, she rewinds the time of the ship, effectively repairing it. She looks and acts more confident than any other time previously shown! However, all it takes is a reaction of extreme surprise from the sailors and her fellow Exorcists to cause her to doubt herself, to the point that she throws herself in the ocean by way of apology |D

What this shows is that when Miranda knows what she’s supposed to do, she can perform exceedingly well. When she knows her job, she acts decisively and with confidence. She shows this a number of other times throughout the manga during various battles. But as soon as her job or purpose is called into question, she falters and flails and generally reverts back to panic mode.

This is why, despite the fact that she’s shown a good deal of improvement in terms of confidence and not apologizing in recent chapters, she seems rather like her pre-Exorcist self in Camp. There’s no war here!! And people don’t die or even fight that often, so her use as an Exorcist is essentially non-existent! It’s really a big deal for her :( It doesn’t help that I wrote her app prior to Camp’s move and unknowingly gave her a job (trail guide) that doesn’t exist in Camp’s new location, either. GO ME. So she has no use, in her mind, and has no idea what she’s supposed to with herself, which in turn makes her more uncertain, flighty and generally spasmodic in Camp than she was back home.

There’s also the issue with her and the Noah at Camp (Tyki, Devit and Jasdero) treating her more or less decently, which is in itself is probably enough for another essay altogether! Or it will be soon because the more she gets to know them, the worse the issues gets. Basically though them not being horrible and Tyki insisting that Noah are humans too has opened a whole can of worms about whether the war is truly necessary, which in turns compounds the aforementioned issue of her not having a use anymore, even back home. THANKS GUYS.

Then there’s Miranda and intelligence. Hoshino has her “Education” as “4/5,” and her “Mental” as “2/5.” What does this mean, exactly? Well, combined with what we’ve seen in canon… She’s above average in terms of books, and a bit of derp in daily life. Innuendos and sarcasm tend to go over her head! She misinterprets things occasionally. Double meanings will escape her now and then. Basically, she’s kind of naïve, and prone to forgetting things occasionally.

Despite this, she is definitely not stupid. Canonly she went to school, and obviously knew enough to survive on her own as a competent adult, even if she was almost continuously fired for being a klutz (if anything this means she’s damn good at math and budgeting). She knows how to operate things like the Order’s golems, and fix up old clocks. Intellectual things probably come fairly easy to her! It’s just when they relate to daily life that she sometimes has problems.

So what does this mean in Camp? Not a whole lot, yet. It means she’s good at figuring out laptops! It means she enjoys puzzles, probably. It means that it takes a bit of prompting for her to figure out things that don’t have much context (i.e. math comes easy. Realizing someone she’s never met before is being sarcastic doesn’t). Mostly it just means that she will have occasional, odd moments of smartness that might seem weird but really aren’t because she’s not dumb! It also means that she spends a lot of time at the library and figuring out computers, because it’s easy for her to do well. I also headcanon that she loev Shakespeare because of her name ("Miranda" is not a German name, and was invented by Shakespeare for his heroine in "The Tempest") and along those lines, other classical literature as well.

Last, and probably least because it really hasn’t been brought up a whole lot yet but is still kinda important, is Miranda and romance/sexuality. More how it relates her to others, than the nitty-gritty personal stuff I headcanon for her. That’ll come later, possibly. Anyways! Miranda is straight, if only by virtue of not... ever considering the alternative :|a She believes, more or less, in Victorian societal norms, but really only for herself. She won’t judge someone for being homosexual or having an otherwise non-conventional relationship. She’ll be a bit embarrassed and fluster some, but will also consciously try to have an open mind about it, because honestly it’s not her business and a lot of time the people she finds doing stuff like that are her friends anyways. This doesn’t mean she’s comfortable with another woman making advances on her! It does mean, however, that the real reason she’s uncomfortable is that she’s not used to such things from men, let alone women, not because of any inherent homophobia. Though she will use “it’s not right!” as an excuse to get out of it if pushed because aaaaaaaaaaah scary don’t know what do!

Which isn’t to say that she’s without a desire for romantic relationships! She thinks Zoro and Rabi and Tyki and a handful of other guys at Camp and at home are physically attractive! She even has a bit of a crush on Rabi. But she’s not necessarily inclined to truly act on her attractions (physical, emotional, or otherwise) because… Again, don’t know what do. She’s not accustomed to romance, or courtship, or anything beyond friendship and she’s still getting used to that because honestly she didn’t have many (if any) people that were truly close to her before becoming an Exorcist. So essentially love is not an option for her, right now. She still needs to settle into Camp and just. Figure herself out first. But she’ll continue to improve and make friends and be blushy around people she likes and eventually even maybe have fun! IT IS A PROCESS.


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Miranda Lotto

June 2011

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